Wednesday, September 28, 2005
Today, during my MA seminar, Val told me this classmate of ours haven been attending class for this week becos her bf left for UK to continue his education. She's too upset to attend class. I can totally understand how she felt now, and i encountered this kinda "departure" twice in my life with 2 different people. Haa..why am i destined to be in LDR all the time? But anyway, i guess this classmate of mine is probably crying her heart out at home and feeling all lost and ALONE. That's how i felt when he left. Everything around me revolves as per normal, the only difference is that he aint here anymore. I have to imagine his presence to feel that he is always beside me, dat is wad i have learnt to master it very well during the past 9 months. And i meant, really a pro @ that.
*Looking back, i really cant figure out how did i manage to be so strong and never drop a single tear when i said goodbye to him. Sadness only overwhelms me right after he disappeared from my vision. But there's nothing i can do to change anything. Its this feeling of not being to do anything at all that makes me feel so pessimistic @ times. But then, its been 9 mths. And i'm still alive and kicking. PHEW! All these seems damn bloody long though, like years has passed.
I used to think im an independant gal who doesnt have to rely on a boyfren, like wad PJ said, we shud be better off without guys. Thats my mentality back during the days when im single. My family, friends, and solely MYSELF are my main priorities. Yet now, i find myself more and more reliant on ethan. Like without him, i cant be "ME". How did this happen? Haha, i really dont know. Sometimes this dependance is soo strong that it scares me off. The thought of him leaving me one day fears me beyond words. Its amazing how my priorities in life can change so drastically after i'm with him. But in any way, im more glad that i always have him in my heart. * '_' *
Sunday, September 25, 2005
To dennis: here's my latest update, pal! haha sorry, too busy to update my blog! =)
Its yet another UG gathering on friday night, the usual ppl turned up. Always full of updates, gossips(CREDITS to Meng!! getting more and more bitchy under our influence), wadever, we just yak non-stop. Me, qimin, meiqi, tingli, mengshun & Leefang, the same old bunch of ppl, except this time round, all of us were expecting sth MORE. Or shud i say, additional members, but to my *pleasant surprise, haha, lucky, its still the 5 gals + 1 guy gathering. Haa, somehow, in some corner of my heart, i hope it will always remain like dat. Ooopsss. Or i dont mind UG + respective bfs can turn up for gathering, besides that, hmmmmm.
Ok, i was the 1st to reach and i was damn urgent, after almost 6 hrs of non-stop seminar and workshop!! Rushed to the toilet and Qimin called. From AFAR, i mean really afar, before she reach the toilet, i can hear her voice already! haha, real loud. But anyway, its really so coincidental that we have a common friend right now, her JC pal is my good pal now in SMU! *Eunice, this really sweet-looking gal who shares the same size as me, haha maybe thats why we can click so much. (To Qimin, drop by our school and have lunch with us lah! its town anyway, haha, call me ah! Eunice wans to catch up with u! )
And finally meiqi is "one" of us! hehehe..so glad for her. =) Except someone else, pls hurry ok? Saw Ting's latest "love interest" too @ the Irish Pub in Orchard Towers..hmm, really the typical-looking Indian except that he's really musical-inclined, hmm besides that i dont know what attracts ting to him. But I really give you guys my blessing, all the best!! All of us hope its not just another passing "tree".
As for myself, im slowly getting used to school life in SMU. New found friends, project groups, hanging ard in school, tight lesson schedules, etc etc. Its keeping my life v occupied. But its kinda hard to tell myself, ok, this is the right environment for me. I really dont know, Qimin & meiqi said if i really cant take it or dislike it, i shud think carefully and there's still time to make changes. Hmm..even so, i doubt i will have the authority to change my decision anyway, its really not up to me. And since im already stucked in this school, i might as well just do my best and dont regret. I always have myself to fall back on and i know no matter what happens to me, he will always be there to support me, even miles away.
Hee.
Anyway, today is 25 Sept. My 9 mths with him. Ya, its yet another month together though i always feel that we have been together for a long, long time. Seems more like 9 yrs rather than 9 mths, perhaps im including the years since we have known each other. Makes me feel so special towards this affection. **Baby, Happy 9 mths!** I dont know what you are gonna say to me when you come back on 21st Nov, but i know what i wanna say to you the moment i have you in my arms. It has been on my mind ever since we are together but i haven got the chance to tell you, ok 21 nov. I'll definitely tell you in person. Which means its less than 8 weeks to seeing you again! Yeah!!!!!! 2 words. CANT WAIT. =) =) =)
Sunday, September 11, 2005
I went to Jenna's 21st b'dae party ytd nite @ costa sands, met up with some of my poly friends..my god, the last time i saw them was i think..during my final exams in march..dats like super long ago. Everyone looked pretty the same..but i felt really nice seeing them again after so long, when i looked at them, i missed our hangout times during school. *sob* Anyway...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO JENNA!!
ALL THE BEST FOR YOUR 21ST BIRTHDAY!
Just makes me wonder what im gonna do on my 21st birthday. Soon..it'll be my turn. *glurps*
true grown-up adult. The thought of it somehow sends a phobic feel to my mind. I wanna remain 20 forever.
Sunday, September 04, 2005
Met Jill, sharon & Jul for a lil' gathering @ NYDC, yeah our fav. hangout place since it was opened. It feels sooooooo GOOD just to sit down and talked our hrs away, its been a while since i rattled so much. Recently, im so lifeless cum emotionless becos' theres nth interesting in my life...studies+projects+stress++not enuf SLEEP+poor diet=HAF DEAD. But just for today, i felt im alive again. Kicking like before, laugh and crap!! Thats how life should be!! ALL THE REASONS TO SMILE * STAY HAPPY!=)
I reckon Jill n sharon are quite carefree about their studies @ SIM & NUS respectively...they seemed rather satisfied,but i looked like i got never-ending complaints about SMU. Juliet got rounder, but its good, cos' at least she's enjoying her life and eating well. Not like me. Mum just told me live with my stress and cope with it. WHY do i have to??!! That totally rebukes the ever-so-famous sentence of "LIVING YOUR LIFE TO THE FULLEST AND BE HAPPY". Im like having never before sucky complexion, insuffcient beauty sleep, eyebags, no time to pamper my body, no facial, no good food, not enuf time spend with baby online, little tv time, no time to bathe my poor vicky she stinks like mad now...REVIVE ME.
Anyway..to my 3 good pals(sharon, jill and jul), DONT FORGET UR CHALLENGE !!! Due by 31 dec wahahaha...nothing to do with me, so im just gonna see who's e ultimate winner & loser!! GOOD LUCK.....heh.
Photos took @ nydc...
Saturday, September 03, 2005
I never realise how precious weekend can be until i finished my 2nd week of school.
Its killing me, yeah i'm only in the SECOND week of the term and i'm simply half-dead.
I just wanna spend my weekend doing nothing but A GOOD REST.
Pure indulgence. BUT, damn, i still need to finish my presentation slides!!!Readings!!!Tutorials!!!!@#$%^&*(ARGGGHHHHHHH!!!)
I cant take it anymore, later im going to meet Jill for a crazy retail therapy session. Sorry baby, i broke my promise...wahahaha...perhaps retail therapy really helps. Next week onwards, then i curb ok? This week is simply impossible not to resort to it. *smiles*
shop, shop, shop...shop my stress away and i'm carefree again. Period.
Thursday, September 01, 2005
**Happy Birthday to Grace!!!!**
...nah, ur fav color-PINK..anyway, hope all ur wishes come true this year & all e best to ur 3 yrs poly life @ TP! Gonna be real fun...esp, when u leave TP, like right now, im missing my business school, biz park, jupiter cafe and most importantly, my khakis!!!!
Talking abt dat, i really miss my poly life. Though its packed with projects and presentations every semaster, but i still enjoyed it, cos' i have this group of wonderful friends who really accompanied me through the whole of 3 yrs in school.
We hanged out in biz lab until 10+ at night to complete our projects(dat was always last-min of cos), sat @ jupiter and ROT cos we got 4 hrs break in between, secretly bio-ing session with Anilia & co, esp @ biz park where we can spot some cute guys lingering ard, the LOUD talking n babbling sessions during lectures & tutorials..i still remember MQ always said im so bloody noisy during lectures cos she can hear my voice n nagging from afar. wahahaha..n of coz my laughter. Which hospi student would actually pay attention during class? class=TALKING/CHATTING session.. who cares abt e lecturer anyway? THAT'S US.
Oh and not to forget, when jill and i was in the same class dunno in which semaster, i still remembered we practically spent every lesson chatting away in class, talkin abt guys, our chihwahwas, beauty n fashion stuff, gossiping abt other hospi-ians, our family, why we r still single after so damn long, new songs dat we sang softly in class..oh man, i really miss those times. Now everyone has dispersed into his/her new path of life...good times never last.
Aileen gg brisbane to study, Annilia & wanrou working and slogging their hearts out, sharon forever busy with her softball n juggling with her NUS econs degree(*good luck*), Juliet working part time @ LV boutique(dont 4get staff benefits k must tell me), silah working @ god knows where i forgotten already, Peifang working @ DBS as a teller...hahaha...so diverse, Elicia working @ Hyatt, Shujun studying @ NTU, Jillian forever bio-ing guys @ her new sch, SIM with Justine & co, and lastly, the 5 guys who shaved their heads n entered NS..wahaha..wonder how they look now, i really cant imagine Jinde with a clean-shaved head. Oh my~as long as aileen loves it.
AND me...slogging @ SMU with my studies. Readings piling up like hell, reports to rush, projects..!! Since i have decided to curb my retail therapy which i have been depending on since yrs ago, im gonna resort to ethanie, vcds, and lots of sleep to recharge. Haa...all FOC & yet achieve the same desired results as RETAIL THERAPY.
Back to school..i need to immerse myself in books again. =(
*Miss my bumming days, i rather be a nobody lazing ard, doing nothing, just shaking legs.*
*georgiana* 
