「 what behind my shadow. 8:59 AM 」

Yeap.
Even though its just a span of 5 days... ...

I'm gonna miss you lots.
lots.
lots.
lots.

Cant wait to see ya again...*kisses*

「 what behind my shadow. 1:57 AM 」

Im so so hooked on flowerpod.
When u are feeling hella bored at home, just surf flowerpod!
Its like making full use of my free time to absorb all da beauty and fashion tips...love flower pod to bits. Lesdames' great as well, but not that much info compared to the prior.

The rants about New York's Skin Solutions are way too scary man. Made me feel kinda regret signing up the package there. Im rather satisfied with their pdts and services, but it seems like no 1 else is happy with their services. Unbearable extraction, lousy pdts, expensive treatments, pushy consultants, insults and kena locked up in the room for few hrs....SCARY!!! Other than em being a little over-pushy, i didnt encounter any bad experiences with em so far. I guess its understandable why these people can get a bit pushy at times cos they eat on commission more than their basic.

Late night shopping...sounds thrilling. I have never tried any of em during GSS. Heard that Marina sq GSS got special discounts during late night shopping! This is really a shopping month for me man. Not only sales in singapore, but in hong kong as well!! Looking forward to my HK trip...a list of places to visit and shop!! And not forgetting disneyland, wanna take a glimpse of my fav cartoon character...mickey mouse! =)

「 what behind my shadow. 3:11 AM 」

HAPPY 21ST BIRTHDAY, JILL!!!!
Must hurry tell me wad happened btw u two ok?? Enjoy your 21st babe! Love ya bitch! =)

Ok, i dunno who da hell used ron's name and tag my board, but pls, for goodness sake, dont be so childish. I know my bf will never say these kinda stuff to me, dont even talk about tagging em on my blog. It sounds more like a joke man.

Anyways,
Im going hongkong for a short trip soon! Am gonna leave on 30th may to shop like crazy. My parents, as usual, wants to visit macau cos of its magnificent casino and prolly, me & my bro will idling around the shopping malls and stoning. Galfrens who want me to get any stuff in HK, pls leave a msg at my tagboard ok? Will try my best to get em. And sharon, yes, i will buy souveniors for u guys, dont worry. haha

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Recently, i feel that im losing more and more of myself, which i dunno why. Sometimes, i lost control over my own emotions and things tt i say. Its not that i wanna get angry or upset over little happenings in my life; just that i cant take all these easy and simply tell myself- forget about it. I cant. And i know somehow, im courting my own doom again. I know it tires you tremendously and u feel like giving up on me. Being like this tires me too, as much as it tires you. If only i like you lesser, things would be easier and you wouldnt feel that everyday, im making you upset. You pampered me by letting me see you everyday; and now that we cant, im grumpy. There's nothing u can do; just let me be alone and i'll be fine. I totally understand why u cant see me, really. But being understanding and how my heart feels are 2 different things. Wadever it is, i will try my best to be okay. I promise you and it wont be broken.

「 what behind my shadow. 8:27 AM 」

Yes, the long-awaited GREAT SINGAPORE SALE is here!!!!
All the great buys and discounts!
BUT for me, it doesnt really make a difference.
Cos' i always cant find my sizes and i hate it when they display old and "long before my time" clothes and sell it at 70% disc. Its crap, already out of fashion and they still expect ppl to buy.

Today i went shopping with ron. Quite disappointing cos i didnt get anything at all from all those shops on sale. No sizes, out of trend clothes. yeeks. Places like Guess, was SO MESSY tt i dont bother to look further. In the end, i bought a pair of levis slim fit jeans and phuture london dress, with 0% sale. =( Ron tried his best to stop me from going into shops without discount, but still... ... heh.

Still waiting for DKNY, CK, MNG, A/X, GG5 to start their sale!! This month's gonna be another hole in my pocket cos i kinda predict i will shop like crazy with all the sales going on and me flying to HONG KONG for MOREEE shopping!!!

Like my blog title, shopping is my life.

「 what behind my shadow. 8:43 AM 」

I realised something about myself.
I always never fail to contradict my words or actions.
Whatever i tell people ard me, it always turn out to be the opposite in the end.

WHY am i eatin on my own words all da time?

So useless.
I told ron long time ago that i need my own personal space so i cant see him everyday. And as time goes by, this is getting more and more absurd. I am totally stuck to him. I became grumpy and angry with him just becos he cant see me for 1 day or so. JUST 1 freaking DAY. 24 HOURS. And im lovesick. Where got such thing one??!! And its only becos he needs to accompany his mum who hardly get to see her precious son. Cant i be MORE understanding?? I also wish to, but i cant! urg.

So, ron made another surprise trip to my house this morning(totally unexpected cos he thot i hung up his phone last night) and brought me lunch, yakult, crispy cream doughnuts & some root water! Yay, so i am no longer grumpy. Happy again.

「 what behind my shadow. 3:41 AM 」

Hey gals,
I need your suggestions!!
What do u guys think of selling stuff online??

I just packed all e stuff in my room and its over-crowded with clothes, cosmetics, bags, shoes, accessories etc etc!
My room's space really running out man.
Clothes with price tags and brand new, or clothes that i have worn atmost 1 time.
Its such a waste to give em to my maid if i can earn a bit of cash huh.

I HAVE SO MANY THINGS TO SELL, i think i can open a shop already.
My parents nagging at me almost every single day for all the stuff i bought.
heh. Anyone got suggestions abt where to sell my things online? Or anyone also wanna sell your stuff, maybe we could come up with a webbie and sell em online together. heh. I need to get rid of em for new stuff. Haha, GSS is coming soon!
HELP!!

Thanks for the little yet pleasant surprise this morning!
I love the way you show your concern and love for me...muahxx.
It was yummy. heh. Finally, after today i wont bug you to cook fish for me again. BUT... ...
i wanna eat jello, brownie, oreo milkshake, blah blah.
Cook for me. OKay?

「 what behind my shadow. 7:58 AM 」

I know its hard.
For us.
We are in this together.
But... ...


I feel like im being loved this minute; and cast aside another minute.
I honestly dont blame u, but i just ... dont feel good inside.
Thats all.


Maybe, persistence is all i need. I dunno.

「 what behind my shadow. 8:35 AM 」

Yesterday i went saturday service with ron at trinity.
And the pastor talked about choices, the power of choices.
Everyday is full of different types of choices that i have to make.
And every choice tt i make holds no regret.
At least i hope.

I think every individual has the power and ability to make a choice.
And somehow, i feel that choice is linked with fate.
Cos whatever choice you make, its fated and decided by the one up above, which in turn, is our destiny.

We kinda went through quite a bit recently. And for what happened, there's absolutely no one to blame. Honestly. Cos there's no right or wrong in a relationship; it only depends on how u wanna look at it, from whose point of view.

And after all these, he asked me a question which kinda stunned me. Not becos of anything, but becos even me, myself dunno the answer at all. Hence, i didnt know how to reply for a long, long time. As i thought to myself, suddenly this word 'choices' came to my mind. I dunno why. But it kinda enlighten me and answered the question. Why do i still wanna be with you? Cos i made the choice to. Cos i made the choice to like you more than anything else. Cos i made the choice to follow my heart. Cos i chose to hold onto you no matter what. Cos i chose not to let go of you easily. All these choices that i made is to hold no regrets at all. And most importantly, so that i wont be unhappy without you beside me.
Its definitely not becos of what you think or guess, i swear. I never wanna pawn you for anyone better.

Now, i answered your question, baby.

「 what behind my shadow. 8:24 PM 」

Finally, i got my vera wang's limited edition 100ml perfume BACK!! And its totally new, no leakage! Yay! Luckily, i managed to get back, if not i will complain until tt woman lose her job @ tangs man. The lady man @ the counter told me its becos of leakage, the color of the perfume changes. So it should look like this, even more GLAM:

Thanks guys! I really love this present! =)
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Its my belated 21st celebration with my poly frens ytd! Finally, we met up after soo long...Jill & **** already 1 mth+ unofficial, Jul & her bf already 3 mths...That is how long we never seen each other! So much to catch up! We went fish & co for dinner and later on, i treat em desserts @ Coffee Club! I really love the company of my poly frens, they are one of my closest pals and everytime i bombard em with a problem, they never fail to give me genuine advices and tell me exactly what i should do. Thanks babes, you guys made me see things clearer, as always. =)

- while waiting for our dearest juliet to come(she's always the last 1 to come), we snap pics like nobody's business in Fish & co despite the waitress getting kinda irritated with us. Cos everytime she ask us to order, we kept saying not ready for like more than 3 times? heh.

We got kinda bored...look @ Jill & sharon's expressionless expressions.

Then, Jill & sharon ordered their favourite...woolala dish! ??? Its none other than OYSTERS! I told em, "it will boost up ur sex drive man". And they got even MORE excited to gulp em all down. hahaha..horny babes never change.

In da toilet, we never stop taking pics too. I like this pic cos my head looks really small...haha compared to sharon & jill.

Head to coffee club straight after dinner, damn we were all very FULL already. But once i told em im treating desserts, sharon said," wa u treating ah? Later must order the most empensive one already!" sickening ass.

While Juliet & jill are busy contacting their other halves on hp, me & sharon were BORED. So we took pics with different expression. Act dao, act cute and lastly, how we kiss. Look @ how she french kiss....err...urps. Lotsa room for improvement! oops.

Here comes the most expensive dessert in coffee club. Haha, yeah, they really ordered the most expensive one! haha

& us eating it all.

ANd lastly, a group shot before gg home!

Time's so short, after 4 HOURS of intense chatting & catching up, we had to leave cos Jill needs to meet someone to go home together. waaa...so sweet.

Oh, before i end, i wanna say thanks to the gift u guys got me! I really adore it man! Esp. when im told its the one and only piece sold in tangs and spore cos its from europe. So i kinda guess its super expensive. But the speciality of this night gown, is not just a nightie, cos once u wash it, u just rub those little red roses on the gown and they will give off natural ROSE SCENT while u sleep. WOAHHHH. I LOVE IT MAN. My gals know i love rose smell the most! heh. (and sharon, thanks for dressing up for me! And show me ur lil visible cleavage..haha)

「 what behind my shadow. 8:53 AM 」

The more i read about it, the more confuse i get.
Why does it seem like there are ALWAYS 2 sides to things, no matter what?
So, then, exactly, which is RIGHT?
When can i ever make my mind?


Maybe, i never will.

「 what behind my shadow. 8:00 PM 」

On 6th may, i had a lil' sweet celebration with my dearest.
I guess everyone knows who.
None other than...

R
O
N


AND i was so elated simply cos' i have NEVER spend my birthday with any guy BEFORE. So he was the first, and i hope, the last too. All that i wished for that day- present, cake, nice meal & most importantly, him. Without him, everything wouldnt seem so beautiful and sweet. So thanks, dar.

I waited near Guess boutique for quite a while until i went in to shop and when i came out, he's still not here yet. haha, due to accompanying me for the past few days, he doesnt have any time at all to get my present and prepare for the actual day. heh. Still, he got me what i wanted(one of those items on my wish list), a denim jacket from MNG and we celebrated with a chocolate fudge cake from swiss bake. Thanks from the bottom of my heart...=)

I sincerely pray that all my 21st birthday wishes will come true, maybe not now, but in near future.

「 what behind my shadow. 1:09 AM 」

Heh. Some of you might wonder why i delete ytd's entry and post this wallpaper instead. Cos way too many pics to post over the past few days' celebrations, so to make things easier, i cramp all the pics into a wallpaper!! Everyone's who celebrated with me are inside, so dont worry!

If you guys want detailed pics abt UG's celebration, pls feel free to visit min's blog for better 'coverage'. Plus interesting captions & storylines. haha =)

Anyway, thanks for all the precious gifts i've received from friends, family & bf. Truly appreciate all the planning and birthday wishes from everywhere. Thanks!!

As a "token of appreciation", here's a wallpaper i've done while poor Ron is lying on my bed, almost dying from flu. haha, time to give TLC to him. Oh, and if anyone is interested to know abt our lil' sweet celebration together, i will post the pics soon and fill u guys with details!
=)

「 what behind my shadow. 6:31 AM 」

Before i go on to blog abt my birthday celebrations over the past few days,
i wanna complain abt this stupid salesgirl @ Vera Wang's perfume counter in CK Tang. She obviously suck BIG TIME. UG got me this limited edition 100ml perfume fr this brand which cost them 175 moolahs. And it leaked. So fang gave me the receipt to xchange @ ck tang. Nothing wrong rite? But tt bi*ch working for vera wang spoilt ron and my mood TOTALLY. She just deserve a tongue lashing from ron, luckily he was there with me. Stupid woman not only dont wanna change the perfume for me, but she went on to say tt its an IMITATION!! wtf. She said vera wang's perfume is not supposed to be this color, SO??? fuck. I also know, tts why im changing it!! And worst of all, her attitude and service sucks like never before, and she kept insisting on A STUPID PRICE TAG THATS NON-EXISTENCE. irritating. Arg. "There shud be a price tag on the plastic cover, like all perfume, but this one dont have." fuck. dunno how many freaking times she repeated and how many times i must explain to her, slow pig. Its a BIRTHDAY GIFT, of cos e price tag is not there la! stupid shiet. And last of all, she's really dumb. Thats all i have to say. I have the freaking CK TANG receipt, CK TANG paper bag, the free gift bag, vera wang's box and she can still say its imitation?! How dumb is tt??!! When i almost wanna blow my top, Ron blew his 1st. He helped me to shut that stupid auntie up. If not, i think i will sure complain abt her man. In the end, she changed her attitude, suddenly became so nice and said she will help us check with the office, no stock now, must order and contact me again. wtf. Shud have said that in the 1st place.
I wonder why Vera wang wanna employ such an old attitude auntie to represent this high class brand. Yucks. Totally screwed.

「 what behind my shadow. 8:04 PM 」

To UG:
confirm already ah? Friday(tommorrow!) meet at town ard 4.30pm, from there either we take bus or take 7-seater from meng to HV ok?
I book settlers' @ 5pm, den after tt we go drinking!!

De Beaute Aromatic Spa
Everything was good and comfy until after i got home. She massage my head and caused to feel giddy! Arg. I shouldnt have let her massage my head. Or maybe its the milkbath tts too hot for me? I dunno...but me & ron like the spa and service there. The place's nicely designed with balinese style and its quite relaxing.I lie there like a pig for her to massage, but for ron, every now and then, i will hear bursts of laughter and giggles cos he feel ticklish when the masseue massage his stomach & chest area, or pulling his toes. haha..so funny.Nice place for couples to relax and more relax, highly recommended. But the price's a bit steep as well, 2 person for 200 bucks. Its a complete spa package cos it comes with a scrub, hydrobath and massage. Go try! =)

I was forced by my dearie UG to do a wish list.
They have no idea what to get for my 21st birthday.
And quoting qimin, "no wishlist, no present".
wth.
haha.
My frens.
At this age, i guess everyone's running out of ideas abt what presents to get for ppl on their brithdays.
Being frens for almost 8 yrs, my frens are REALLY running out of ideas.heh.

Ok, i have no wishlist.


BUT


There are a couple of things that i wanna buy. which i haven buy.
haha...here they are:
-a nice hat(the white with gold lining one @ ninewest, but might be a bit big, haha)
-more lingerie(only triumph)
-denim jacket(slim fit)
-stila limited edition makeup
-hood jacket, not sporty type
-vera wang's perfume

haha...guys, please consider carefully. HAHA.

「 what behind my shadow. 7:22 PM 」

Never ending sprees.
Wherever i go, i shop like crazy.
Cant stop. why? Am i addicted to shopping????!!!
i think i am really becoming a shopaholic.

Went to town with shihui on mon to shop...my dear galfren made a WHOLE LIST of shops ard town that she wants to visit!!! Ultimate shopper, no wonder we are best of frens. She practically rummage the whole of orchard and wrote down one by one shops & their location and we started off with far east, went searching high and low for some shops that are never found. hahaha...i wonder why after 01-61, 01-62, 01-63...it became 01-65??? WHERE is 01-64?? haha, wierd huh.

Dar, so sorry i broke my promise of spending a limit of below SGD 10 bucks...haha, its like a mission impossible to me. Unless someone keep my wallet away from me. 10 bucks not even enough to buy a pair of earrings lo. heh.

And not to forget our fav. place for snapping pics...nowhere else but...
cool toilets.
Apparently, scotts' toilets arent that nice after all.


Yesterday, i went out eunice for a free trial facial @ New York's skin solutions! Its good, at least i think its not too far off compared to Jean Yip. Pls, dont ever go FIL. Its like a slipshod facial treatment, no quality @ all. My poor lil' face was red for a few days the last time i went there. Vow never to go back there again man even though its been paid...anyone interested to try? Its too rough for my sensitive skin. For NY's skin solutions, she used collagen and penetrate em into my skin! Feels soo smooth and radient after that even without makeup. And best of all, the pdts use natural ingredients like ginseng, honey, etc and its all custom made for ur skin, depending on your skin type! Ok, i sound like im advertising for em, but i was really quite impressed with em. My beautician, Beatrice, analysed my skin under a dunno what, but all my pores, freckles, facial hairs and wherever its clogged can be seen SO DAMN CLEAR!! She said my skin's condition is good, but cos its so thin(if u guys notice, capillaries and veins can always be seen ard my cheeks), i have to take extra care of it and make sure its hydrated enough. And one last comment she made tt i think was damn true: I cant go for cheap facials. seriously.
Im not being critical here abt people patronising cheap facials, but there's really a difference btw the pdts & masks tt they use which is damn important in a facial, cos thats wad facials are all about rite? And also, the service. I wanna feel extra relaxed and comfy when im doing facial, some places(like F*L) just dont have that. And those cheap facials(i did a thorough analysis when i was doing my project, 'ethical issues in spas', revealed that they made the facial package seem soo damn cheap tt people are so tempted to sign, its actually just an upfront payment, cos after you sign, they will keep pushing other packages to you and make u pay even more and more. Yah, tts wad i found out about some spa or facial companies, even those established ones practise this. And my paper-thin skin cant endure harsh treatments and rough handling from facials. I will look like a burnt lobster.
Anyways, back to NY's, i recommend all to go for a free trial. (min: interested hor? just call and make appt babe!) and let em analyse ur skin and try their facial...u never know the results.
I will post pics of me & eunice another day, haha, cos this entry is getting a bit too LONG. Anyway dear, thanks for your present!! I really love it, so like me! And what i have looking for! thanks!! =)

「 what behind my shadow. 7:06 PM 」

It seemed so real.
That i have to blog it down cos, im afraid.
So so so afraid.
They always say, "if you let people know what ur dreams are, they wont come true."
I cross my fingers and hope that it will never come true.
Ever since what happened, i have been having similar dreams.
Dreams that woke me up each time i have it.
Way too scary. I fear em like how i fear insects.

Dreams VS reality.
Somehow, after checking dream dictionary, it kinda reflects what happened in my life sometime ago. All the happenings in my dream seem to connect to one another.

Beg:
To dream of begging someone, means you are anxious about something or someone that you want in real life- and you are worried that you wont get what you want.

Breaking up:
To dream that you are breaking up with someone is a signal that there are feelings or situations in your life that you want to get rid of. Or, it could mean that you are refusing to accept a situation that's being pushed upon you. If you dream of someone else breaking up with you, you may have low self-esteem or feel alienated from others. This could also be a straighforward fear of rejection.

Crying:
If you dream you are crying, your mind is helping to achieve emotional balance while you sleep. You are getting out frustrations that would slow you down in your waking life.

Everytime i dreamt of these, i am sooo damn relieved when i finally woke up. Cos, after all, it was just a dream. But it send shivers down my whole body when i think of it occuring in reality. Really. I dread of all these again. I dont know why i kept having all these similar dreams that once happened before. Everytime i think back, i feel like crumbling and my lil' heart will ache.

Pls, pls, pls.

Now that i have you back again, i dont wanna lose you once more.
Cos im barely hanging on.

Yeah, my 21st birthday celebrationsss.
There it goes.
Tmr i'll be celebrating with dear in town.
Facial + shopping. haha, one in a million kinda celebration.
3rd may: spa indulgence with ron & movie(MI3)
4th may: TK 4c...ktv & dinner
5th may: UG...settlers & drinks
6th may: dedicated to him only. =)
Poly FRENS.....to be confirmed.
shihui...not yet to be confirmed.

21st ALREADY. gosh, i have lived more than 2 decades since 1985. So old.
Yet still so many dreams to be fulfilled. So much to achieve.
Hmm...21st is a significant year to me. From now onwards, i have to make some revolutions to my present life and evolve changes. Not so much of that spoilt brat, geo. I have to live like how a woman gotta live. yeah.

Birthday wishes?

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Nothing much, not a single wish lists of MATERIAL STUFF like clothes, jewellery, $$$ or wadever. I have enough & contented. All i want now is peace, happiness and security. And live each day without fear at all. Most importantly, be loved by all the people who matters to me. Thats all i wish for.

Happy 21st birthday to me...5 more days.