waiting for you

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Im supposed to be enjoying my hols.
For these 2 weeks since hols started, i have not stopped moving on. Everyday im moving faster and faster, even i cant keep up with my own pace. I know, i know i should slow down, thats what everyone have been trying to tell me directly or indirectly. I know all these, but do the present circumstances allow me to do this freely? Can i stop even for a moment?

Life always revolves around tradeoffs. I always believe in that, if someone wants to do well in a particular thing, he or she has to give up something in their lives. Just like how elated i was when i saw some positive feedback abt mds, a negative customer who was dissatisfied with her 1st purchase changed her opinion towards mds after buying from us subsequently. I felt so consoled when i learnt abt tt. Thats consistency in doing a business. How many people actually, truly understand why im working hard, or harder than most online sellers? Its important to me becos i know it is. Besides fashion, i dunno wad else i can go into after graduating from smu.

Nearing 22 yrs old, i dunno what i have achieved yet in my life.
Maturity? Grades? Stable r/s? Or a good business?
Gosh, the thought of all these scares me off. Sometimes, i feel that he dont understand me at all. Does he really know how i feel? Why do i feel that im always chided for being too stressed up, too uptight? Pls understand that all these negative emotions tt im feeling ARE NOT WHAT I WANT to feel. If i can choose to live a life of a bimbo, i will cos i can afford to. But for once, im able to build my dreams and do what i want. I chose this path, to juggle btw mds and my studies, i gladly accept everything that comes my way, but what i need are support and REAL HELP from closed ones. Not when im stressed, he or she will ask you, "what again? what's wrong with you? Why like dat again? I told you i will help you already what."

Thats not what i need. Its neither words of consolation, nor real actions to help me. Its beyond what i can bear. Bottleneck.

For my upcoming b'dae, im declaring a 1 week off from mds and EVERYTHING ELSE. Time for a break. This may sounds childish, but i really just wanna contact FRIENDS whom i can talk to, who chide me lidat. Thanks.

Friends, you know who you are, contact me pls.